Grief and Loss Counseling
There isn’t one type of loss, one “type” of grief. Usually we think of the loss of a loved one, a relationship, a job, our health, or a beloved pet. For some time, this can be emotionally devastating. This is grief as a natural response to loss. But, consider that there isn’t “grief”; there are many facets. It depends. But, when feelings of grief become more and more isolating, when you’re avoiding all reminders of your loss, or when you can’t avoid any more, when you’re overwhelmed and depressed, when you’re on an emotional roller coaster, when you’re not “getting on with it” as family, friends, or co-workers suggest and expect, it can be beneficial to talk with someone who doesn’t judge you, someone with whom you can express what’s bottled up inside–the blaming, the what-ifs, the anger, the despair, the hugely conflicting feelings, the hopelessness, the self-destructive thoughts and behaviors, the tidal waves that absolutely crush you. There is all that you hide or can’t hide.
There is grief for the loss of structure, of the routines we took for granted, of our “solid” plans and ways of being, of solutions when there seem to be none. There is loss because there doesn’t seem to be an answer to “when will this be over?”. Light at the end of the tunnel?!
As we age, we sometimes grieve the loss of our younger, smarter, healthier, fitter, achieving, productive, knowing, fun-loving, crazy, doing, in control, strong, steady, creative, sought, respected, future-oriented, seen Selves.
There is loss of identity–Boss, CEO, Senior Partner, Judge, Principle Investigator, Doctor, Nurse, Professor, Student, Mother, Grandmother, Father, Brother, Artist….
And there is the felt-threat among some who suffer loss and who despair that we as a species are in final peril of extinction.
Who in our Human tribe would go outside the village, the castle walls, the proscriptions, the dictates, the “answers” alone?
Grief and loss are not simple.